In case you have no idea what that title is about, read this first, then come back here. Now that you are caught up, here’s the update. I left the state. I still won’t say where I am, for reasons of personal safety.
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Happy New Year!
1 JanHappy New Year. That’s the politically correct thing to say, right? Meh. Either I’m supposed to be cheerily looking forward to the coming year, or contemplatively looking back at the year just past.
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Transgender Day of Remembrance
20 NovToday, November 20th, is the 24th annual Transgender Day of Remembrance1. On this day we remember, and celebrate the lives of, those in our community lost to violence, whether it be external, or self-inflicted.
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Two Vaccines at One Go
26 OctYesterday, I went down to the local pharmacy, at 4pm, to get the current flu vaccine, and a Covid booster (Pfizer). Like with the Shingrix vaccine, the injections themselves were not a particularly big deal.
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Hang On, This Will Get A Bit Heavy
21 OctWhen I was maybe 13, I had to get a “physical” exam because I was going to play middle school football. Right. Still masking, so ultra masculine activity. Anyway, I was referred, by a coach, to an older pediatrician that the team used regularly for said physicals.
CW: Childhood Sexual Abuse, No Details
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Am I Trans Enough?
15 AprHave you asked yourself “Am I trans enough?” This is a particularly significant question for transgender people who waited until later in life to transition, or are only just now exploring their gender as adults. The standard narrative of “I knew since I was a child” and “I transitioned young” certainly is a feel good narrative. However, the alternative that turns out to be true for many, many people is that we knew something was wrong, but couldn’t understand what that something was. We went many years thinking that we were somehow wrong, and begrudgingly accepting that we were broken.
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Am I Transgender?
13 AprI am a transgender woman. I am not a professional counselor. I have been diagnosed with gender dysphoria. I am romantically attracted to women, which makes me a lesbian. There is a common misconception among cisgender people that trans people, by definition, experience a particular sexual orientation. To be specific, that trans women are really just effeminate gay men, and that trans men are just masculine lesbians. Nothing could be farther from the truth.
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My friend depression
21 FebMy friend depression is making another visit. Since we all know how well I do on antidepressants, I’m taking a different approach this time. I have decided to try St. John’s Wort.
St John’s wort is widely known as an herbal treatment for depression. In some countries, such as Germany, it is commonly prescribed for mild depression, especially in children and adolescents.
And since I react to pharmaceutical anti-depressants pretty much the same way as children and adolescents (I become suicidal, remember?), I am trying St. John’s because it doesn’t seem to have that side-effect. I just started at last night’s dinner, so I am only two doses in. I’m going to try to start actually updating here again, so look for progress reports hopefully at least weekly.
Why am I depressed again? Well, it’s primarily, I think, due to my recent breakup. She decided to end our relationship after nine months. I won’t go into details as to the whys and wherefores of that. But I think most of you have probably had similar experiences, and may even have had some depression for a time afterwards.
So wish me luck, and better mental health. I’ll take all the good energy I can get.
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The Grieving Room: I Guess I Made It
6 JunCrossposted from The Grieving Room at Daily Kos by wyldraven
On the eighth of June, I will mark the one year anniversary of Barbara’s death. I still don’t know exactly how I will do so. Anecdotal evidence indicates that most spouses who survive the first year as a widow/widower will continue to live a normal life span. Point in fact, death from broken heart syndrome is rare.
A special welcome to anyone who is new to The Grieving Room. We meet every Monday evening. Whether your loss is recent or many years ago, whether you have lost a person or a pet, or even if the person you are “mourning” is still alive (“pre-grief” can be a very lonely and confusing time) you can come to this diary and process your grieving in whatever way works for you. Share whatever you need to share. We can’t solve each other’s problems, but we can be a sounding board and a place of connection.
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Another try with anti-depressants for fibromyalgia
17 FebThis past Tuesday, I started a very low dose of amitriptyline for my fibro, with instructions to “ramp up” the dosage as needed and tolerated. I started at 10mg, with instructions to increase dosage in 10mg steps up to 50mg per day. Continue reading
Adventures Of An Aging Trans Woman 